I'm feeling quite low and negative at the moment. Well, actually, just today really. I've been fighting a cold for a couple weeks, fighting the urge to smoke (yes, stress makes me crave it), fighting the stress that comes along with dealing with the current economic climate, fighting the urge to spend money on fabulous things (I've been a non-shopper going on 4 months now!), fighting the urge to worry if our jobs are safe.
While I've been fighting all this and keeping positive, I have been the housewife, the banker, the cook, the cleaner, the grocery shopper and the all-around Wonder Woman. And yes, I'm thinking what you're thinking:
She'd look really hot in that satin outfit with those gold bracelets.
The mister has been busy with his work battles and parties, so I've been picking up the pieces around us and getting us organised for Christmas.
And my body has thanked me in the only way it knows how: by shutting down my immune system and making me sick and weepy and feeling sorry for myself.
As I'm writing this, I feel like there are white blood cells scattered on a battlefield gasping for air while the little germ beasties are standing over them with sword held high, victorious. You see, the last time I got sick was.. hang on.. I think it was a year ago, so I'm not used to feeling like this. Plus, I hate that I cannot snap my fingers and fix it immediately, so I end up pushing myself even harder, and wonder of wonders, making myself even worse.
But anyway, I'm sick. And tired. And fed up with being negative. And fed up with being stressed. And it all came crashing down on me today.
And to top that off, Christmas party season in the UK is a nightmare, because I end up worried if the mister will be ok with so many late nights/early mornings of letting his hair down.. It's not a pretty sight (I know, because I've been there myself a bit).
So today, for once in a very long time, I feel like my spirit is a bit broken and needs MacGuyver-like mending.
I need hugs. I need kisses. I need someone to stroke my head and tell me that all of this will pass soon and normality will set in. I need someone to take care of me and not expect me to be fierce and fabulous and fun every day all day.
Even Wonder Woman's bracelets get dented from all those bullets hitting them, you know?
2 comments:
Thanks for visiting my blog! I am sending you cyber hugs, cyber kisses, and wait...you feel that? That's a cyber head-stroking. Hang in there, this time of year is hard on everyone. I lost a baby in October and two friends/family members delivered healthy babies yesterday. I need a bit of hugging myself! XO
I know what you mean. Except for the partying thing. I have two Christmas parties to attend and that seems overwhelming to me.
I'm just getting over a vicious cold. When I get sick, I take off the gold bracelets, put on the flannel p.j.'s and take lots of naps on the couch. Because I'm worth it. :)
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